One of the many benefits of mediation is that you can discuss and explore options in meetings without signing up to them. It is a place to explore, consider, discuss and test. You can then reject the idea, trial it, think about it more, take advice on it or sign up to it after the mediation. This flexibility really helps people to understand what options are, what they look like and crucially whether they will work.
Sometimes people have an idea of what they want to achieve. You may have discussed this prior to coming into mediation. A mediator will work with you to check that what you are talking about is realistic. How does this happen? Well in lots of different ways such as:
- Ensuring that you have information about your financial situation so that you can make informed choices by properly understanding the money and assets you both have, and those you own jointly.
- Explaining processes and things you might need to think about so you can check this and discuss them between you. For example, if you want to keep a property and stay there can you take on the mortgage and release the other person? If not they might not be able to purchase an alternative property. Is that problematic? If it can’t be done now when does it need to be done by?
- Exploring “what if” scenarios to road test the workability of your ideas.
- Encouraging you to seek legal advice on the options either generally or with regard to specific points.
- Suggesting you take time to think and consider things so that decisions are made calmly and without pressure.
When you’re worried, overwhelmed and worn down there is a temptation to just want a solution to bring things to a close. It’s entirely understandable but it is crucial to put in place solutions that will work for you. They need to work for you in the next 6 months and the next 6 years and potentially beyond that. On a very simple level in order for financial options to work you both need somewhere to live and you both need to be able to meet your outgoings. Sometimes that is relatively simple to sort out. Often it requires a lot of creative thought and reality checking to make sure it is workable and viable.
If you would like to set up family mediation then you can call us on 01306 320520. Or you can book a 10 minute chat or an initial meeting with a mediator online. You can attend meetings online or at our offices in Dorking and Farnborough.