Dealing with the breakdown of a relationship can be heart breaking at the best of times but if you are going through a divorce and you didn’t want to separate, it can be overwhelming.  If this sounds familiar, here are a few ways mediation can help;

  • Give yourself time – In mediation, you will never feel rushed into making any decisions or changes until you feel ready.  It is your process and mediation will proceed at a pace both parties feel comfortable with.  Your mediator will talk to you both about the Grief Cycle.  It is common for two people to be on very different points on this Cycle and your mediator will be able to support you with this. 
  • Get support – your mediator will offer a safe space for you to voice your worries and concerns about the future.  They will also be able to sign post other organisations that can offer your support, like co-parenting workshops, therapeutic support and legal advice. 
  • Take control – the decision to separate may have been taken out of your hands.  There will, however, be plenty of other decisions that need to be made going forwards.  If you and your spouse can discuss matters in mediation and agree a way forward, this means that you have taken control as to what the future is going to look like, even if it is different to what you thought it was going to be.    
  • Be realistic – you may be eager to move past this painful period in your life, but it is important that any agreement you reach is sustainable and realistic.  Your mediator will support you with this and raise any issues that he or she can foresee causing difficulties ahead.