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Returning to work following a separation?

In this blog Claire Gardner shares some insights from her own divorce.  She explains the fears she had surrounding her journey to being financially self-sufficient and how she draws on that to help other women who are having to look at going back to work following a divorce or separation.  Many couples make decisions that one person will stay at home to look after children and historically this has often been mum’s role (although at LKW Family Mediation we have…

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A simple way to think about co-parenting

This video was put together by Louisa Whitney from LKW Family Mediation and Una Archer, a psychologist, from Parenting after Separation.   Parenting after separation can feel very busy. You may find yourself carrying more responsibility for your child, whilst learning to navigate the co-parenting relationship.   Una and I put our heads together to hopefully help you simplify things a bit, let go of things that are not essential and make more space for what is important for you.…

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How a Divorce Consultant can help during the Mediation process

This blog is a guest blog by divorce consultant Rhiannon Ford. Rhiannon is a divorce consultant and coach providing support and guidance to people before, during and after divorce. She is based in Walton on Thames in Surrey but works with clients all over the country and UK nationals living abroad. If you have agreed to use the family law mediation process, hopefully you are feeling fairly optimistic that with the help of the family law mediator, you and your spouse…

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Arrangements for Children: Review and take stock

We have recently been doing a series of blogs focusing on how you can minimise the effects of your separation on your children.  Tip number 5 was to review the arrangements that you have made.  We suggest that you check in with each other regularly (say every 3 to 6 months depending on how long you think the arrangements need to run before you know if they’re working or not).  You can then talk about what you think is working…

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Stopping things turning nasty

When you separate from a partner there can be a whole myriad of emotions.  Anger, resentment and fear are common and it is sometimes from a place seeped with these emotions that each party reacts.  When you react from a place of anger or fear you can often be seen as being aggressive or threatening.  A defensive reaction is often one designed to launch a preemptive attack and to wound before you are wound-ed.  Our brains are complicated machines but…

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Focusing on the children in a separation

In our list of tips to help parents minimise the effects of their separation on their children we have now reached tip three: making sure the arrangements are child centred.  As we have suggested before this might sound obvious but it’s important that your arrangements take into account the different needs your children have.   Talking to your children is key in this.  Sometimes parents worry about talking to their children following a separation:  they worry that they might say…

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Getting it right for the kids

This blog is the focus on the second tip for minimising the effects of your separation on your children.  It’s about finding a system that works for you, and, crucially, works for your children.  We often get asked what the ‘usual’ arrangements are for separating parents.  The truth is that there is no such thing.  There is no law, rule or specified time that each parent must spend with their children following a separation.  There are only arrangements that will…

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Communication, Communication, Communication (FB Live)

In this Facebook live we talk more following our blog about communication between separated parents and why it’s so important.  We look at why communication matters, and what to do when it really isn’t working.  We suggest ways you can acquire communication skills and make things better when talking to each other is providing difficult.  

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Communication, communication, communication

When you separate from a partner the thought of continuing to have a relationship with the other person may be something that causes you upset, discomfort or stress. But if you have children that is the reality of the situation. You will need to talk about any issues that crop up to do with their schooling, their health, their behaviour or anything else significant. It may also be important to your children that you are both able to attend ‘big’…

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